Guitard

     I've been trying to learn the guitar for a while now.  Turns out, it's kinda hard and hurts my fingers.  Remember that time I asked for a unicycle for Christmas?  Yeah, it's kinda like that.  Sure, it "would be cool" to play the guitar or ride a unicycle, but who has that kind of motivation?   But seriously, if anyone wants to teach me, I want to learn the guitar.  That would be cool.

     

     Sometimes when I have big ideas like learning the guitar or starting a blog, I picture myself getting invited to Oprah because I am so incredibly famous.  I guess that's all the glory I need, because I am all talk no follow-through.  No, really you should try it.  It's like getting the reward without any effort, and Oprah is that cute up close.

     Speaking of cute, I was applying for a scholarship the other day when I thought, wow, I can make myself sound pretty pansy-ish.  Writing to me is like an excuse to be a pansy.  That's why I like it so much.  I can really express myself.  See, "express myself" = 100 on pansy radar.  You know what I mean.

      I guess somebody is considered mature when they can appreciate the arts.  I consider myself appreciative about the arts, but still giggle inwardly when a poet uses the word "gay" for happy or when an artist paints a bum crack.  Ha, I said gay.  What do you think the artist is thinking while he's painting a bum crack anyways?  Does he use a model?  

    Nah, I really love art, but Jay knows what I'm talkin about.  

     

Forever Young

I always thought blogging was for Emo kids but here I am.  This summer has been pretty exciting as always.  I work putting medical kits together in a tiny room for eight hours a day.  One time I counted to 1,000 just to see how long it would take.  Turns out it took 23 minutes.  Shoot, maybe it was 27.  Well, looks like I'll have something to do tomorrow.  

I've been thinking about attending the singles ward, but last time I went the only cute guy turned out to be a missionary. Also, everyone thought I was 16.  I'm often mistaken for a high schooler because of my fresh, attractive features and my glistening braces.  I'm actually 20 years old.  When I was 18 I got carded at The Da Vinci Code.  That's right...a PG-13 movie.  It does have its perks though.  A waiter once brought me a free kids' sundae at a barbeque restaraunt designated for children 12 and under.  Also, I'm surrounded by low expectations, which makes impressing people pretty dang easy.

On June 11 I am finally getting jaw surgery to fix my bite.  That means the braces come off around November.  Watch out world.  I am pretty excited about it.  It means I will be on a liquid diet for about 6 weeks eating my meals through a syringe, but hey my teeth will finally fit together.  My roommate suggested I eat an entire jar of peanut butter to gain weight before the operation.  In my opinion, this is the best advice I've ever received.